Stephanie
Lehmann was born in foggy San Francisco and didn't take her
sweater off until she moved away to college. She spent most of her childhood
watching television. Almost every night, she fell asleep to the sound
of Johnny Carson on a small General Electric black and white TV in her
bedroom. This was when he still broadcast from New York City.
She listened to him talk about multiple locks on the doors and muggers
on the streets and dirty subways. She thought anyone who chose to live
in NYC had to be crazy or just dumb. She spent Saturday nights watching
The Brady Bunch before they were in reruns, dressed like Marcia, but
was more like Jan. Her very favorite TV show was That Girl with Marlo
Thomas, who was the first true "ambitious single woman living in
New York City" sitcom heroine. Stephanie's fantasy to live that
life competed for years with her fear of moving to such a decrepit,
mean and ugly place.
Stephanie can remember deciding to become a writer in a fit of existential
angst when she was twelve. She desperately wanted to be published in
American Girl magazine. She talked her parents into buying her a typewriter,
and wrote some very bad short stories. She received the first of many
rejection letters.
In high school, after a few unpleasant (no boyfriend, mediocre grades)
years that were redeemed only by hanging out in the theater department
and working backstage (too afraid to act) she went to U. C. Berkeley
and missed the best years of Saturday Night Live. She had, for once,
a social life, but no television.
She bought an IBM Selectric, but was unable to believe she could actually
have a "career" as a writer. So she didn't even buy the kind
of IBM Selectric that had self-correcting tape, and had to use the backspace
key, then insert one of those little white plastic sheets and retype
the incorrect letter to cover it over. (I bet some people have no idea
what I'm talking about.) She got a B.A. in psychology thinking she might
become a therapist because she liked to listen, and she loved the idea
of hearing peoples' secrets. But after taking a writing class with Leonard
Michaels (THE MEN'S CLUB) and taking his praise way too seriously, she
kissed a regular income good-bye and dreamed once again of being a writer.
After graduating from Berkeley and spending a year hanging out, working
in a cafe, getting depressed and feeling like she didn't know what to
do with her life, Stephanie Lehmann decided to move to New York so she
could do the same thing in a more crowded location. She was still drawn
by the lure of New York City, but was still intimidated by it too, so
she arrived as a student in the NYU Graduate Program in Creative Writing.
She was lucky enough to get the lease to a small, dark, roach-infested
apartment of her very own in the East Village of Manhattan. She set
up her IBM Selectric on a desk she bought at the Salvation Army, slept
on a futon, still had no TV, and was afraid to walk in her own neighborhood.
She started dating a guy from Long Island who was in her writing workshop
at NYU. He had a nice apartment on a high floor in a modern building
in midtown and a really nice RCA 27-inch color TV. The fact that he
used to be a television repairman clinched the deal. She moved in with
him, and they watched Night Court and Cagney and Lacey, shows that seemed
good at the time, but what was I thinking? In any case, Stephanie Lehmann
felt much better about her life and more in touch with America now that
she was watching TV again. During this period, she wrote two novels
on her IBM Selectric. Neither one got published, but she did get lots
of temp jobs based on her excellent typing abilities.
A few years later, she bought one of the first computers sold for home
use (gee, this is making me sound old), a Kaypro with a seven-inch black
screen and green letters that she still has in storage next to her IBM
Selectric. She also got married to the ex-television repairman and had
a couple babies. Among many other shows, she enjoyed watching Love Connection
hosted by Chuck Woolery, which may have laid the ground work for her
current fascination with The Bachelorette, Average Joe, Playing it Straight,
American Idol, The Apprentice and other assorted reality shows, but
let's not get started on that.
She feels privileged to have reached the point in her life where she
must fight with her very own children over who gets the TV, a flat-screen
32-inch Panasonic. Luckily, her husband doesn't watch much, other than
the Yankees. She owns a down coat, a wool coat, many sweaters, and really
looks forward to the summer. She now writes on a Dell laptop but is
resisting upgrading to a wi-fi because she'd just be checking email
all the time. She does not allow her children to have TVs in their bedrooms.
Stephanie Lehmann's novels are THOUGHTS WHILE HAVING SEX, ARE YOU IN
THE MOOD? and THE ART OF UNDRESSING. She's now at work on another one.
Her son wishes she would stop having embarrassing titles. Her daughter
prefers the Shopaholic books. And her husband is a high school English
teacher who still writes, too. Stephanie Lehmann is no longer afraid
to live in New York City.